Strange Buggers

Posted: December 19, 2008 in Uncategorized

Many a time, much to my confusion, strange buggers I don’t even know come up to me in public and start babbling. I can only assume the Raalahami Association is secretly paying them to torture me with their incessant chatter, what with yesterday’s criminal incident. 😉

But instead of shooing them off with an annoyed look on my face like I used to, I have now chosen to deceive them into believing a pack of lies for my own personal entertainment. Psychotic, I know.

So the other day at MC, this Strange Bugger, moustached and middle aged and looking Sri Lankaney suddenly appears beside me while I am surveying pictures of burgers…

Strange Bugger (SB): Aah hallo! Are you from Male (the country)? (squinting and pointing)
Me: Uh no…?
SB: You’re Sri Lankan?
Me: No. Indonesian. (the web of lies commences! BahahAHAHAA!)
SB: Aah! Hi! Jakarta here! (offers handshake… which is awkwardly ignored)
Me: (Jakarta? Is that his name or is it a freakish coincidence he’s from the very country I lied about?)
SB: So how long you in Sri Lanka?
Me: Oh, four months.
SB: Ah where you stay?
Me: Galadari.
SB: Shaa! Posh hotel.
Me: Very.
SB: You work or…?
Me: BBC.
SB: Aah! You’re a reporter??
Me: Yaah. And you know that BBC weather reporting fellow?
SB: Russell Chikera?
Me: No no! Bob Filbert? He’s my husband.
SB: (Looking confused at ‘Bob Filbert’) Oh… you’re married also?
Me: Yaah (points at random toddler running in circles in the distance) That’s my kid.
SB: Aah! Cutesy baba.
Me: Yes. Very cutesy baba.
SB: How old?
Me: Three. Here, I have to go now! Must fly to cover the riots..
SB: Aah! In Peradeniya?
Me: No. Tibet.
SB: Busy busy no? What about cutesy baba?
Me: That (points at random white guy) is Bob Filbert. He’ll take care of cutesy baba.
SB: Aah OK! Tell hi to Dalai Lama from me! (guffaws hysterically at attempted joke)
Me: (With sad serious face) Dalai Lama died this morning. Monks told not to report the story till the burial is over… Anyway, bye!
(Exits while SB is looking dazed and confused)

  1. h@sn@ says:

    hehe…best way to get rid of these morons…you are the ‘stunt’ queen man..and now i know how to get rid of ’em IF ever they bug me :p

  2. Sigma says:

    LOL – way to go!

  3. FINroD says:

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA OMG woman!!! THT WAS PRICELESS I cant believe u pulled it off!!

  4. TheWhacksteR says:

    oh you mean person you

  5. The Unsilent says:

    hahaha awesome.. u r blogrolled!!

  6. Jack Point says:

    Super super super!. I'm rolling over laughing. You have some gall, gal.

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