Interview with the Boogyman

Posted: May 21, 2009 in Uncategorized

Me: Well, nice to have you with us, Mr.. uh, Boogyman.
Boogyman: Please, call me Boogy.
Me: K. So how’s business been going for you lately?
B: It’s been pretty rough quite frankly. Hard to scare kids these days.
Me: O rly?
B: Yeah. First I think I scared them ’cause they run out of the room.. but then they come back, with a snack from the kitchen for me. ‘Cause they think I’m just a poor homeless hobo with skin issues. -_-
Me: Wow that’s gotta be hard on you, Boogy.
B: It is. I’m out of a job, and.. and I’ve got two little mouths to feed back home.
Me: Oh, how old are the kids?
B: What kids? I was talking about the dogs.
Me: I see.
B: Suddenly, kids are scared of those dumbasses from The Ring and The Exorcist. What’s so scary about little girls anyway?
Me: They are pretty freaky looking.
B: Look at me! I’ve got discoloured skin and big yellow claws for godssakes! When did that become all ‘lame’ and ‘uncool’ HUH? TELL ME, WHEN?! *sob*
Me: Get a hold of yourself, man! Sheesh.
B: Sorry. I just.. get so.. so emotional sometimes. It’s hard. One moment you’re the most feared fictional character that ever lived, the next, you’re being rejected by everyone ’cause they’re looking for ‘scarier acts‘!
Me: Like Chucky?
B: Like Mike Tyson. Or Michael Jackson posthumously.
Me: Posthumously? Michael Jackson’s not dead!
B: Wha- he’s not?! Dayumn! He’s got some mad skills then.
Me: And Mike Tyson?
B: Uh huh. He says some weirdass shit, man.. gives me the heebijeebis. Wouldn’t want him jumping out of my closet!
Me: …Ookay.
B: You probably think I’m lame too huh.
Me: The sobbing kinda threw me off.
B: I’ve been through a lot OKAI!
Me: The pang of rejection eh?
B: Yes. I’m contemplating reinventing myself though, like Madonna.
Me: You’re going to jump around in a spandex suit?
B: No! I meant reinvent myself the same way she- nvm. I’m planning on revamping my image is whaddaimeant.
Me: As in.. hair implants?
B: That was uncalled for.
Me: ehehEHHEH.
B: Maybe change location. People’s closets aren’t working for me anymore.
Me: Yeah I heard about your arrest last month.
B: The kid called the cops on me! The !$#@!%$ midget! But I was in that closet for a while.. left him a stinky little surprise in a shoebox in there.. *sniggers to self*
Me: …right. Anything you’d like to tell the people reading this?
Me: What was that?
B: Um sorry, that’s something new I’m trying out instead of my old ‘BOO!’ Think it worked?
Me: …no.
B: I was thinking BOOYAKA but Ali G’s already got that one down.
Me: Mhm.. anything else you’d like to add to that *cough* enlightening insight?
B: Yuh. Add me up, bitches.
Me: Woah what’s up with the profanity, Boogy?
B: I’m trying to sound like Mike Tyson, man. Grrr! I’ma bigass nigga who likes to rape things! *gropes the air*
Me: Dude. Overkill.
B: Shutcho mouth biatch! Grawr!
Me: Are you going to bite my ear off now?
B: Depends. Would it scare you?
Me: I have pepper spray.
B: I guess that implies that this interview is over?
Me: yesbye.

  1. Azrael says:

    ROFL :DPoor Boogey, Times are hard 😀

  2. Sigma says:

    Conversation with an ex boy friend?

  3. santhoshi says:

    that was funny 🙂 where indeed is the boogyman

  4. Gadgetgirl says:

    Lol.Boogey sounds a biiiit newbie.

  5. Serendib_Isle says:

    Ranjan Ramanayake, right?Hah ha ha!

  6. chathuraw says:

    LMAO…Hahahaha… Poor boogey…. 😀

  7. Ahamed Nizar says:

    haha hilarious!

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