Archive for October, 2009

Bright brown

Posted: October 30, 2009 in Uncategorized

the shade of coffee, cinnamon, firewood.
Brown crispness inside perfect circles, alive, declaring loud.

Fear induced in a human reflexively causes the rush of the hormone adrenaline through its blood stream, which makes the iris of its eyes contract, so its pupils dilate, and then the colour of its eyes shoot out, ablaze, the raw tint of clarity.

Beautiful, really.

Busperv Syndrome

Posted: October 23, 2009 in Uncategorized

Buspervs frequent in.. well, buses.
Characteristic behaviour includes strong bodily gravitation towards female species within immediate vicinity.
Symptoms of busperv-affliction include cringing at leery smile on buspervface and sudden urge to commit violent act on it using sharp object.

Interaction with busperv species may lead to some or all of the below:
1. Death by revulsion.
2. ..

yeah that’s pretty much it.

Precautions that may be taken against busperv to prevent catching busperv-related diseased and general potential eeya-ness are as follows.

1. Elbow it in the hip during its gravitational journey in your direction.
2. Knee it.
3. Place roll of paper/giant ruler/heavy bag/random object between busperv and you.
4. If environmental conditions are such that objects and limbs are immobile (i.e. Papareboy’s mum gets into the bus and everyone is consequently pushed against each other in an ugly sardine frenzy) then ask very loudly if buspervs think siddhalepe will help lessen your acute case of leprosy.

This has been a public service announcement, till we find out if pepper spray has even been introduced to the Sri Lankan people yet.



Posted: October 22, 2009 in Uncategorized

Stressed out?
Feels like the world’s on your shoulders and you wish you could take a time-out from life.
Nothing is working for you?
You fix things up but oh, they all just come loose at the seams and you have to start from scratch again.
It hurts?
You trusted people and they stabbed you in the back and you can’t trust them again so you’re on your own, woe woe.
You’ve had enough of it now, so you want to write emotional poetry about it or run away or hit someone or scream or, your favourite, whine about it with an air of distinguished world-weary cynicism till it becomes your trademark!
Alas alack, your world is plunged in darkness and you’re in your lonely little shell and everything seems so hard to overcome…

well, that’s sad and all but.

Get over it.

Haha I was always shit at the sympathetic approach to advice. 😉
Works for me though.
A yum reality check brought to you by OK Go>

Is it a man’s world after all?

Posted: October 19, 2009 in Uncategorized

Do you feel safe walking out alone on the streets after 7pm?
Why not?

Well there you go.

Colour is life.
They define and set contours and moods and emotions and statements.
One of the lessons we learnt in sketch class at college.

Pardon me for being repetitive with the college thing this week: it’s become the bulk of my life whether I like it or not.
The past two days were surprisingly great though.
I blame it on the fact that I have been wearing my magic shoes.

Me: Man, the scary lectureman didn’t murder me today. It must be cuz of my magic shoes.
Captain Obvious: They’re called Converse, genius.
Me: Ssshhhh shut uppp, you’ll hurt their feelings.

Anyhoo, here’s me experimenting with colour on portrait shots I’ve taken.
Utterly fun.

and my personal favourite…

In other news, I am going to calm my generally disoriented sleep-deprived mind with some Harry Potter at Liberty this weekend. Nothing like a new movie to relax a critic.

I find the randomness of Dumbledore’s gayness (literal gayness, that is) kind of hilarious.
Does anyone else imagine the wizard at the salon, fluffing his head of white hair and going,
‘Pierre, my hair is like, so not working today. So like, do something about it kay.’

No? It’s just me?

Cheer up, Emokid.

Posted: October 13, 2009 in Uncategorized

Emokid opens the door and steps outside, squinting against the sunlight.
Damn this sunlight to hell, for it is sheer mockery in the face of my sorrow, he thinks, before sipping on his carton of Tang orange juice.
Slurping, all melancholy-like.

He heaves his backpack over his shoulder and stops to look at himself in a glass window.
My hair obstructs part of my peripheral view, and my eyeliner is uneven. They are like the metaphors of my life, for a part of me is always concealed behind a shroud of obscure gothic mystery and… well, I need to like, stop using Loreal eyeshadow, it’s like, so whatevrr.

Maybe today won’t be so bad, he thinks, maybe life- life will get better, if I just-

He trips on a shoe lace and falls into a puddle.

Woe unto me. Life is a series of tripping-on-shoe-lace-and-falling-into-puddle-s. Also my carefully combed side-hairpartline must be totally messed up now, omg.
Why, god? Why dost thou forsake me in such a way that you would make me trip and fall into a pool of dirty water that symbolizes the drowning of my very soul in despair?
Thou art so unbearably cruel.

He gets up and wipes a tear as he hears a laugh in the distance, quite clearly at him. I mean like, why else would anyone in the entire junction be laughing besides at him right?
Crude humans, they extract joy from the misery of others such as myself, thinks Emokid wistfully, whilst flipping his hair bangs in a depressed-Baywatch-lifeguard-like manner.

Why do I not have any friends? he mumbles to himself, as he drags his feet over the hot pavement.
Why do they always leave?
I mean, literally. Why do they always get up and rush out of the room when I start talking?

Is it because of the darkness of my spirit, the emotional depth of my being, the black aura of death that lingers around me- someone said it’s cuz my nipple rings and incessant whining make people uncomfortable, but lololol yea rite!!!11111

I cannot take the cruelty of life anymore, it is too much for my puny fourteen year old shoulders to bare, I must take my life tonight sobsob, he says to his lab partner in school.
He pauses, waiting for the freckled girl to gasp in horror and give him a hug that he would need to soothe the pain inside, and convince him that the roses of life are but-

Fell in a puddle again huh? Here, use my razor. It’s a little crummy from shaving my legs but it works.

Emokid stares off into the distance and resists the urge to facepalm because that’s not a very emo thing to do.
Instead he readjusts his hair bangs and whispers into the musty lab air the three letters that sum it up best, FML.

disclaimer @ emokids
all satire was made in jest, please do not attack me with razor/eyeliner pencil.

ZOMG epic hecticness.

Posted: October 9, 2009 in Uncategorized

College has begun. :O

Cue the horror music.
For I am back to a curriculum.

Everyone out there, who is taking a break from studying, savour it, man.
Cuz if you’re anything like me (i.e. lazy), switching back from a life of relative indolence to pretty-much-school is, in the words of Keanu Reeves, like woah.

Back to people telling you what to do (just when you were snugly fitting into the pandithaya role also!), to seniors being cooler than you because you’re a noob, to… actual work.
Aiyyo, I was never good at taking things seriously.

My batch seems well balanced and normal. Disappointing.
They do not appreciate my purple shoes and self-made Joker card tag,

Hee hee.

or comprehend my singing-about-Himal’s-mum-to-the-tune-of-the-Stacy’s-mum-song-on-the-staircase (St Fallen sucks for not singing this at Open Mic, BTW.)/ blatantly-falling-asleep-in-class-on-2nd-day behaviour. But then, who does?

They are in cliques. Namely, the hip girly clique, the nerdy girl clique, the poser fgt clique and the boorish boy clique.
I really hate classifying people, but it’s kind of hard not to when they so clearly gather in tightly knit groups when it’s time to hang out.
Quite fun to observe though, how cliquism is often a reflex human ritual.
I flit from group to group based on the point unto which the convo turns gay. Also I am fickle and weird; it becomes more apparent when you move inside a cliqety society.

Nevertheless! Everyone is super nice, especially the seniors.
Who seem way more fun and loosened-up. Hopefully, my fellow comrades in grueling college training will follow with time.

It’s been just 6 days. And already, I’ve been too busy to get back to calls or texts or people, have experienced blood-curdling fear because of this eccentric lecturerman’s temper tantrums

and absolute sleep deprivation from assignment work, resulting in me calling a tuk-tuk driver Kusuma instead of aiyye, and repeatedly random-pointing at Papareboy and laughing whilst saying UR MUM.. oh wait, I do that all the time.

But there has also been free fudge chocolate cake, free kottu, visits to ubercool art galleries and much mindless laughingness.
So maybe I just need time to settle.

Btw, random ice cream treat for the blogger bunch at Carnival this Sunday, 3pm.
I shall pay for the first 20 walk-ins.
The rest will starve and be ridiculed.