Metrosexualman: to gay or not to gay, that is the question.

Posted: March 4, 2010 in Uncategorized

“Yeah I’m metrosexual.”

“WHAT, you actually admit that you’re.. metrosexual?”

“Yeah so what?

“Do you wear eyeliner too, sissy boy?”

“Yeah I wear eyeliner. Whatevah!”  

“WHAT? LOLFAG.”

“Whatevah! It’s my hot body, I’ll do what I wan’!”

-thus is the narration of a recent conversation among male peers, approximately, inadvertently cascading into an episode of Southpark.

Apologies to my homie Will for the title. Twas too catchy to resist, bro. Metrosexuality. Can a Sri Lankan man pull it off? Some guys just wear eyeliner and studs and shiny shirts for attention-whorage purposes. One doing so as a true fashion statement has been found to be very, very rare.

A metrosexual man is someone with an unabashed appreciation for aesthetics and his appearance, a trait that is usually thought to be possessed by females, and so the term is quite naturally confused with – especially in Sri Lankan society –gurlyman FAG!!11 lololol.

No, really.

You’ll find full-out metrosexual men shaving more than their face, knowing the what’s-to-know of contemporary fashion inclusive of owning a collection of designer shoes and maybe carrier bags, going to a salon as opposed to a barber, lacking the urge to ridicule and destroy shirts that are hot pink, and above all, admitting to all of it to members of his male clan. He still probably guzzles beer and  thinks about Megan Fox like any average guy. This was a man of the 17th century (ironically, the era when ‘gay’ = happy). Yes they wore tights, fine it looked hilarious, ok their artsyness made some of them pretentious, but they were definitely more aesthetically cultured than 21st century’s Mr Average Guy.

With the combo of basic heterosexuality and their socio-behavioral similarity to women, one could even theoretically conclude metrosexual men make more understanding partners.   

Mr Average Guy however (a character labelled and formulated by society as a constant) is thought to feel fashion and hair conditioner are girl-things, as is Miss Average Girl thought to feel trousers and soccer are guy-things. So with the exception of the uncannily-like-a-wraparound-skirt sarama, ‘I am man, man no like girly stuff like smelling nice and admirin orchidz! GRAWRUH!’ is still the general sentiment.

gay? or just… pretty?

Is the grey area between the two words: metrosexualman? dun dun DUUUNNN!

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Comments
  1. purpleboxers says:

    mmhmm now why does that opening dialog sound familiar? 😛

  2. Chavie says:

    FAGS!!111 lolol 😉

  3. greene says:

    will you marry me

  4. Not Gay says:

    I’ve worn eyeliner occasionally. It makes guys look quite hot.

  5. Not Gay says:

    Btw, metrosexual is a quite dated term. No one uses it anymore.

    • makuluwo says:

      Opinions vary, I think the right type of face can pull it off as with women. 🙂
      And really? People in my vicinity use outdated terms I spose. >.>

  6. Adam Lambert just hit me on the brain when i was reading this.

  7. LOL @ girly man video.

    Guess what? The famous Pond’s Vanishing Cream was bought by more men than women (fact). There is a fair share of men using fairness creams as we write… (fact).

    Metrosexual = David Beckham, not Adam Lambert; we silly lankans always get our knickers in a twist, don’t we? LOL.

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