The Last Airbender: the gist of it

Posted: October 17, 2010 in Uncategorized

Spoilers below if you haven’t watched Avatar the Last Airbender, the animated series. If you have, then no worries, nothing new was added to the movie.
If you still haven’t watched the series after I said that, you are sucking as you read this, stop being so full of suck and go watch it.
Basically, the four nations of the world are Water, Fire, Earth and Air, and some people in these nations can manipulate these elements. Fire nation’s taken over the world (or as the movie implies, India has O_O) and it’s upto the Avatar to restore balance.. balance.. balance (echo).

Here we go.

Annoying white kid and his sister from the Water nation walking around glacier in blue costumes.
“Oh look, there’s something glowing under the ice. I am going to indelicately break the ice over here to see what it is, despite the fact that it could be anything (evil Fire Nation stuff) and that cracking it this violently can totally make the ice under us fall out,” says annoying white boy.

Giant ball of ice with boy inside pops out of the ice. Shit, scary stuff right?
Nope.
White girl just runs and goes and cracks that shit open cuz she’s hardcore like that.

Bald phillipino emerges as Avatar and stuff. Cool.

White kids take phillipino back home. Lots of blah blah here, especially on part of Grandma saying wise things.

The Fire nation prince who turns out to be the guy from Slumdog Millionaire, comes over looking real angry (Frieda Pinto’s fault I bet), finds phillipino, takes him away. “I HAVE THE PHILLIPINO. I shall finally have my honor back. DON’T MOVE, PHILLIPINO, YOU MAY BE THE AVATAR BUT I AM A VIOLENT INDIAN SO DON’T YOU FUCKING MO-”

Phillipino moves.
Flies away from captivity on his totally cool bison.

Blah blah blah. Some cool scenes when Avatar moves stuff around with air.
Some shots of Indian people in a cafeteria. Or a court. Whatever.
So many shots taken entirely from the animated series that the predictability was disappointing.

Annoying white guy likes white haired princess, who has cool hair and can act. As opposed to everyone else on the cast besides the Slumdog Millionaire indian. He was very convincing of his batshit-crazy rage and deep seated daddy issues.

Blah blah blah.

WAR BETWEEN FIRE AND WATER NATIONS. AWESOME GIANT LIZARD CLIMBING UP THE WALL LIKE A T REX ON CRACK. GRAAAWRRR SO COOL.

White haired princess dies. Annoying white guy cries. I’m happy.

Phillipino totally saves the day by dealing with his feelings and scaring the baddies away with a giant tsunami.

Ends with everyone being all, that phillipino’s got mad skillz yo. And phillipino’s face looks at the camera and goes, FML.

..

So basically, M Night Shayamalan took the animated series, picked some scenes from the first chapter, threw in some graphics and got some bad actors in bad costumes to act them out in a rush. It was a spoof of the series.

Well done.
The funniest part was how he decided to go blatantly racial with this; Water nation was full of Americans, Fire nation of Indians with that little lived-in-the-US vibe, Earth nation was Japanese, and Air was like a mix of the Phillipinos, Indonesians and a black dude. I really don’t know where he was going with that.

I’m disappointed most though, that when the evil Indian commander disses the Slumdog Millionaire guy in the cafeteria, they edited out the fun part where they all do a coordinated bhangra jig. They didn’t really say they edited it out per se, but it was a dramatic moment and everyone was Indian with nice hair and wearing the same clothes, so you know, duh.

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Comments
  1. Chavie says:

    Shayamalan should go DIAF. Srsly. -____-

  2. ubersweet says:

    This movie was a slap in the face of the the series. MNS totally destroyed everything dear about the show. I was so looking forward to it that even after the bad reviews, I went to see it (I love the series that much). MNS should not be allowed to make movies. Aang’s (NOT AUNG) name was butchered!! How could MNS make a movie where the main character’s name wasn’t even pronounced right???!!!

    Sorry about the rant but I’m still upset over this travesty!!! 🙂

  3. magerata says:

    I thought it was a cool movie but I watched it ages ago. I have not read the series so I had fun watching it in IMAX 3D.
    Do not pout your lips too much, someone might think you are giving a kiss 🙂

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